On their leaflet, Army Navy’s corporate mission promises: “Come in Hungry, Walk Out Happy.”
We weren’t looking for anything specific. The beat of hunger pounded on our guts soon as we entered the expressway. This was simply a case of curious hunger knocking on the first door it comes across with.
We pulled over to the spacious lot and come in, well, hungry. A bit enthusiastic, too. The well-versed counter server adjusts his glasses as I scan the overhead menu on the wall. My feet take a step backward, perhaps that womanly intuition saying scram. Nothing less than a hundred save for extras, sides, drinks and a dessert. A bloody bottle of Corona sells for P150. Wow.
As we wait for our meals, I inspect its small and utilitarian space brimming with upbeat people, mostly young ones.It bears that casual, unpainted-brick-wall atmosphere as its sibling chain, Yellow Cab. Points for the GenX styling, though open recycle bins right beside customer tables however theatrical aren’t what I’d classify as pleasant.
Fifteen waiting minutes and our orders arrived. In utter excitement, the husband bites his burger in a hurry. He didn’t seem too pleased. I share a taste, hoping it would be smoky or peppery or beefy. Anything to make it standout as a burger. But it was flat as Kate Moss’s chest – at least in the same spectrum where supermodels reign. Even the toasted sesame seeds on the bun failed to make it exceptional. Ironic for a fastfood joint that boasts an unforgettable burger and burrito selection.
I take a jab at a cardboard box of Freedom Fries (P75), emaciated, almost paper thin. Crunchy, airy and verging on orange it is. On another cardboard are eight stringy slices of Onion Rings (P75). Sides usually come thin here. The rings are coated with a nice light brown breading, but sadly too bland for a friggin’ onion. I’ve had much better onion rings at Mayric’s in Espana (much heftier, too).
I washed off the grease with freshly brewed iced tea, a P75 beverage that tasted much like Lipton.
The two proportionate slices of Crunchy Tacos (P160) are just average. On the up side, it’s beautifully layered and overflowing with greens, cheddar cheese, tomatoes and beef, which is enough if you’re only after quantity.
Our cold glass of tea was running out and twice over 10 minutes, I had to remind a single busser for house water. He filled our already used iced tea glass. A no-no for food joints, but we do it at home most times. I take he was simply dazed, with most of his cohorts busy at the order counter, cooking or chatting.
I looked at the pamphlet once more and zoomed in on that boastful mission. I smirk. Honestly, neither of us walked out happy. Just full. And raided P600+ off our pockets.