But the following day or two, the pain would swim right back into my bed. So I hurt myself some more until I had to wear jackets and pants at home in the sweltering summer heat to hide the wounds on my arms and legs.
Every over-the-counter medication and tool I used for self-harm were confiscated. “You will live.”
Some find redemption in career success, friendships, intimate relationships, or religion. I found mine in the purest and most unconditional love. It turns out that sometimes, it’s the children who save their parents, not the other way around. When I look back at the morning I questioned why I had to be kept alive, I am relieved that I now know the answer. I am eternally grateful for this second shot at life. There are parents who suffered the same trauma and, despite their great love for their kids, succumb to mental illness – sometimes with grim outcomes.